Bitter Sweet Celebration

         We spent a wonderful Memorial Day weekend camping in Kentucky with great friends.  Several times throughout the weekend we made note of the changes coming to our family;  bigger tent, more stuff, I will no longer be making solo trips to the bathroom, etc.  It is fun to imagine how our lives will be changed forever as well as the lives of Anastasia (Ana) and Taisia (Elli).  We finished the weekend off by celebrating a major milestones for both Anastasia and Taisia.  On May 26th, Taisia turned 18 months and on May 29th, Anastasia turned 3 years old.  I can't help but feel bitter sweet about the celebration.  On one hand, we had hoped to be in Russia in May to celebrate with Anastasia but God's time proved better!  On the other hand, the girls probably know nothing about us yet.
        Can you imagine being 3 years old or 18 mths and having your mother hand you off to complete strangers?  Waiting for her return for over a year?  Introducing you to someone as your sibling only to have never seen or heard of her before?  Followed by being told a new mommy and daddy will be coming to take you to a new home, new brothers, pets, lifestyle, language, and country?  Their lives have been so short but full of confusion, insecurity and hurt.  It almost seems wrong to cause more pain and confusion by removing them from the orphanage and caregivers that they have come to know well.   However, just like our journey to eternity is never without troubles and heartache, these girls will be better for it.  While I am still trying to figure out how to be joyful in those times as Paul calls us to be, I know the troubles and heartaches mold me, refine me, and make me shine like gold before our Lord.  This is what I hope for the girls.